Wanted: President of the United States of America

Job Description

Equal Opportunity Employer ( Applicants will be judged solely on their merits, not Planet or Universe of Origin)
Primary duties will include (but not limited to)

• Fix an Economic Depression, greater than the Great Depression of 1929 (!*!*)


• Balance the budget from a current deficit of 1.2 Trillion (1.2 000 000 000 000)


• Pay off the National Debt which stands at 10.6 Trillion (10.6 000 000 000 000)


• Cut the cost of Healthcare ( 2 Trillion spent in 2006) Highest amount of money spent on healthcare worldwide but ranked only 37th in terms of quality and service


• Get America off dependence on foreign oil and fossil fuels


• Develop renewable forms of energy


• Actively combat global warming


• Rebuild America's Infrastructure Network


• Find a lasting resolution to the Israelo-Palestinian conflict


• Contain the nuclear ambitions of hostile Countries (Iran, North Korea and Venezuela)
  
• Stabilize the Middle East

Interested applicants should forward their resumes and salary requirements (not to exceed $500,000) to weareintrouble@pleasesaveus.com